Tonight,I made lunches for three of my kids for their first day of school tomorrow.My heart hurts, badly .I know they will have a great day...my heart will be breaking . I will miss them, like I do each and every day.Ye,t I know they will learn, flourish, make new friends and have great year. I love them so much.It's hard to believe the 3/5 of my kids are now in full time school age. People who don't home educate, have no clue the joy found in having your children home with you. The time is precious...I wrote them each a note with some cute little jokes on the back..I miss them already and cannot wait to hear all about their great day,but wow, life can really hurt.I pray that someday my mourning will turn into rejoicing with tears of joy at all that God has restored to our family...I know he is working!Just like the Israelites when they were stuck up against the Red Sea with no place to turn...BUT GOD...He always come through...never in a million years would I have believed you if could have told me what the past 14.5 months of our life would have consisted of. I feel like i keep getting pushed back , yet iI stand up and fight harder.. for what was stolen from me, my family.Yet, the tears never stop falling, sometimes.I feel my eyes are like windshields in a hurricane, where I can see not more the one inch in front of me, yet, I keep driving because I know home is near.I love you Jayden,Austen, and Moriah..I a, so sorryMama's recovery is taking so long...I a so blessed to be your Mama. I need nothing more in life...except to be a fully restored family.Please keep praying.